Purple Night

[February 13 2012]


1. Lindsay Lohan is a real person. 2. Her boobs are as big as they tell you in pictures. 3. Sofia Vergara, or a woman who looks a lot like her, can climb couches in heels. 4. Shame was the best advertisement for The Standard that will ever exist. 5.You should always hoard your pee all night for the Boom Boom bathrooms. 6. Because when they don’t smell like vomit, as they did after 2AM last night, they’re the most beautiful place in New York to do your business. 7. It is hard not to think about childbirth when you’re fighting your way to an open bar. 8. Based on a sample of one person, guys who wear seersucker in the winter are really good at getting the bartender’s attention. 9. Open bar ends abruptly at 1:13AM. 10. Negronis cost $18 at The Boom Boom Room. 11. Strange women throw their selves at Alexander Skarsgaard. 12. He smells like fresh laundry. 13. Sometimes he grabs the junk of his male friends and laughs like a child. 14. Women find that irresistible, too. 15. Johan Lindeberg is the easiest person to ID in any crowd. 16. No one wears purple to a Purple party. 17. They mostly wear black. 18. Brad Goreski wears pink. 19. One woman wore sequin wings. 20. Sometimes great voices die and the world keeps turning. R.I.P., Whitney.

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